1116 Love yourself as you are

Last modified by TLE Archivist ONE on 2024/01/10 20:37

1116 Love yourself as you are

Date: November 16, 2022

Session type: 60 min 

Channeled by: Nick Sweeney (Babylove)

Note from Archivist: The TLE Library is primarily an archive of sessions channeled by Troy Tolley, and all work presented here should be assumed to be channeled by Troy unless a note like this one is included. 

Babylove (aka Nick Sweeney) was mentored by Troy, and participates in the TLE Community as a student. We have elected to post sessions channeled by Nick in this library if shared within TLE because these sessions often continue conversations begun with a session channeled by Troy or vice versa. Other content channeled by Nick may be found by searching for ChannelNS.

Bogi: Hallo Michael, thank you for taking my questions.

Today I have a mix of topics that are (loosely) connected. I could describe these topics with “Dancing with myself and with others”, “Center of Gravity”, “Wounding/ wound(s) that remain(s)”, “How to source happiness in myself”. Basically, these topics describe my relation to myself and to the world.

You said “Your struggle as we perceive it is the struggle to source your happiness in yourself, rather than in another. You are working out how to allow another to SHARE your happiness. But this process has been a distraction because you are still learning how to trust yourself and another.

Also, you have worked so hard and come so far to define and love yourself; you are savoring this completion and testing it in intimacy with another, naturally, throws you out of that center.”

You also said that regarding Irsia from 2240 “My lifetime is seen as one that truly explores internally as a way to find better ways to relate to the outer world.”

You said that “Every person will always have some wounding and every wound can be healed, but even the most healed of wounds can be reopened. This is why healing your wounds is only part of the goal.”

I have seen a pattern of mine re-emerging again and again in my relationship with myself and with others. A pattern that points to the direction of my Core Wounding, Ugliness.

The ugliness that has come to be at the core of your wounding is all about the questions of "what is wrong with me?" and "what is right with me?"”

When you ask what is right with you, it sets you up with the assumption that you deserve better and that you might not be getting what you want because you are not being properly rewarded.”

I admit, I feel many times not seen or valued or appreciated for who I am. My current working situation reminds me a bit of many past (and current) situations in my life. First, I experienced this in kindergarten, which I could describe as “never the favorite”. That I am not people´s first choice. I was such a cute kid and I felt unseen and underappreciated.

Internally and externally, I tend to struggle a lot. My internal life can be a big roller coaster. I think this struggle comes simply from my personality design/ set up: anger is an emotion that comes naturally to me. I get angry very easily. But every time I rile up myself, I tend to push myself out of my center.

***

With all that said, I would like to hear your opinion.

1) What is my Wounding that remains/ have remained that needs to be addressed?

2) Where do you see where I struggle in my interaction with others that needs my attention and care?

3) When and how did I unlearn sourcing happiness in myself and how can I help myself to source happiness in myself more?

MEntity:

We have read your words and questions and will compile our responses.

1) As you may have guessed, you are still working on the core wounding of "ugliness".

This wound that still has some bits to heal, and there are some parts of this wound that have healed and yet are reopened as you seek greater interaction and intimacy with others. When the remainder of this open wound is "touched" or when healed parts reopen, you are faced with the truth you have come to learn and accept which is that you are beautiful, that you are not wrong, and the lie that comes from the wounding. Or rather, comes from the interpretations made by your younger self, your less conscious self, about what childhood events and relationships meant about you.

In your case, anger can be a good fuel and tool to be used to support your healing, if the anger can be seen as your courage to "get to the bottom" of your relationships and your reactions within those relationships. In other words, your anger does not need to be dismissed, hidden away, stifled, or repressed. It can be the catalyst for your curiosity and courage to go deeper in your understanding and assimilation of your relationships.

It can be a prompt to look for the lies and to get at the truth.

If you are reacting out of proportion to an event in a relationship, perhaps reacting more to what you imagine than to the reality of the situation and relationship, then your anger is likely more about the past than it is about the current situation or person.

With this "alert" of your anger, you can then consciously seek to get clear about what is going on. This requires honest communication with yourself and others. It requires curiosity and a motivation for insight and CLARITY which is a powerful motivation for the scholar.

When your anger is due to the actual impact of an event in relationship, then that anger can be used to express your voice and clarify your boundaries.

So we think that maintaining your center or getting back to your center hinges upon your core motivation or essence as a scholar: CURIOSITY/KNOWLEDGE.

You have reached a place in your evolution where you are aware of the difference between false personality/defense/separation and true personality/love/harmony. You no longer have to hide the full spectrum of who you are but can bring this whole self out into the open so that it can relate with others and therefore learn, grow, and update its programs.

In short, you can allow your vulnerability and embarrassment at your younger, more immature, and wounded parts.

This is AUTHENTICITY.

And this is the direction for your remaining healing.

2) Some of where we think your struggle lies we have shared above. We will add TRUST and INNOCENCE.

You are still learning to trust yourself and others as a baseline for relationship. This trust implies an embrace of the full spectrum of who you are: all of the good, bad, and ugly.

This trust is a trust for evolution and that no matter how messy or painful a relationship gets (including the relationship with yourself, of course), it can sort itself out.

It is not wrong because of the mess. The mess is just a means to an end. The mess is the pathway to the beauty. So you can trust "the nature of things" when it comes to relationships and embrace your wholeness even as you are healing.

This is closely related to yours' and others' innocence. Part of the choice for curiosity and for knowledge and clarity is connected to essence recognition and the realization that everyone, including yourself, is doing the best they can. Everyone is trying to love. Everyone has wounding. Everyone is innocent underneath the shenanigans of False Personality.

Your growing emphasis on TRUST and INNOCENCE (essence recognition) will help to smooth out your interaction with others. It will also help you to CLARIFY who you want to spend your time and intimacy with and whom you do not.

3) First, we think it would be helpful to define happiness in this context as the embrace of BEING or SELF-ACCEPTANCE. Happiness is often thought of as a quantity that must come from outside of the self. This is especially the case in a Young Soul world. Our older soul students have this programming that is automatically running in the background: that happiness must be attained or "retrieved" from outside the self. But true happiness is always sourced from within the fragment. It is generated through the embrace of the self as the self is from moment to moment. In other words, when you are alone and resting in yourself, as yourself, the degree of self-acceptance for your own processes of consciousness and processes of the biological vehicle determines your degree of true happiness and true contentment. From this state of surrender and being, you reach out into the world share your happiness, your embrace of the full spectrum of life. Your embrace of being not only the awareness of life, the contents of life, but also life itself.

Currently, no human escapes the experience of leaving the self/self-happiness/self-acceptance and the return to the self. Only the relative duration of this "journey" differs.

Some leave and return quickly and learn how to return often, as it is not a sustained state. Others, the majority, leave and take quite a while to return to the self. And some never return until death and the review.

We would say that this programming began, the fundamental structure for "looking outside the self," was built from the ages of 0-7 and solidified from ages 7-14 for you and for most.

Now, to your question about how to learn to source happiness in yourself more-this is a vast topic that we could approach from many angles.

Our whole teaching could be said to be a roadmap for how to learn this. So, this will continue to be an ongoing conversation as long as you study with us.

That being said, perhaps the simplest suggestion for you would be to LOVE.

Love yourself as you are.

Love yourself as you are becoming.

Love your challenges. Love your grace

Your grace, your ease, your effortlessness.

Love your wounds.

Love your vulnerability.

Love your innocence.

Love your pain.

Love your healing.

Love your fear.

Let yourself love yourself as essence loves, with NO CONDITIONS.

For there are no conditions under which you are not loved, under which you are not a part of the wholeness of essence and existence.

There is nothing you need to do, be, or have, in order to be loved. So, you can accept ALL of you as you are.

This is a start. This is also the ending. This is the truly the essence of what you came here to learn. It is the highest truth.

You are loved with no conditions.

The more you can let this love BE and choose this love a personality, the more you will find that you are naturally a happy being. You are naturally happy with yourself as you are.

Then you can love others, as well.

You can share your love and happiness with others.

We will conclude here for today, Bogi.

Good day to you and goodbye for now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Michael really wrote a beautiful hymne about love, right? 

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