0104 Imprinting and the Nature of my Struggles

Last modified by TLE Archivist ONE on 2024/01/10 20:35

0104 Imprinting and the Nature of my Struggles

It was a very relaxed session for me. I think it has to do with feeling home with myself more and more. 

My aim was to address the nature of my struggles and to see where I am right now in this process.

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Date: January 4, 2022

Session type: 60 min. 

Channelled by: Nick Sweeney (Babylove)

Note from Archivist: The TLE Library is primarily an archive of sessions channeled by Troy Tolley, and all work presented here should be assumed to be channeled by Troy unless a note like this one is included. 

Babylove (aka Nick Sweeney) was mentored by Troy, and participates in the TLE Community as a student. We have elected to post sessions channeled by Nick in this library if shared within TLE because these sessions often continue conversations begun with a session channeled by Troy or vice versa. Other content channeled by Nick may be found by searching for ChannelNS.

MEntity: Hello, Bogi. We are here, now, and can begin.

Bogi:

Hello Michael, thank you for taking my questions.

Today I have a few topics that may or may not be related to each other.

My first question is about the 4th IM. What is in terms of imprinting/ programming that is still there, and that I have not shed or addressed it yet?

MEntity:

You have actually addressed ALL relevant imprinting and programming related to the theme of this rite of passage: defining yourself on your own terms.

What we mean by "relevant" is any imprinting and programming that was interfering with your capacity for choice relative to self-definition.

This does not mean that you will not, from time to time, pick back up the imprinting that you have set aside in order to work through deeper layers of healing.

But it does mean that you have learned the difference between what is yours and what is not yours, between what serves your self-definition and what does not.

Do you find that you are currently looking at imprinting that you have picked back up for review and deeper healing?

Bogi: 

I agree with your assessment. I just wanted to have a second opinion about imprinting. I also think that I have addressed them. I think that right now it is not anymore about the imprinting, rather the focus is on my willingness and capacity to choose for myself. And making choices for myself can be both exciting and also terrifiying.

Basically, I feel like I have reached a point where I am actually able to choose, and I am standing there and asking myself: Okay, but what should I choose. And I am already okay with it that nobody will answer this question, but me.

MEntity: Yes, as one prepares to exit the 4IM, one is usually experiencing an exhilarating taste of freedom while at the same time experiencing a terrifying weight of RESPONSIBILITY. Defining yourself on your own terms and owning the creation of your life catapults you into the truth of your aloneness which can be quite a profound rite of passage for the old soul. You are learning through terror.

Bogi: Is learning through terror the old soul´s way of learning or is it just me? lol Are there any other methods that one can use beside terror?

MEntity: 

It is one of the most evolutionary prompts for learning for the old soul, yes. No old soul escapes this rite of passage. However, the old soul also learns through PLAY, and choice and play are always intertwined because in order to truly experience freedom, one must be able to know the ultimate safety that is universal truth. YOU ARE SAFE.

Yes, only you can choose, and yes, you will experience the consequences of your choices, but this can be fun when you embrace the truth of your safety.

Part of the imprinting that has been shed is the lie that once you choose, that's it. Conclusion. From your new vantage point of consciousness you know that choosing never ends.

This is a part of the play that underlies your personality's awareness.

If you are safe, and you will always be choosing, then you can turn your attention to the joys of learning and creating.

Bogi:

I understand and I agree. We are never done, and we are never done choosing.

I started the 4th IM about 10 years ago. What do you think, why did it take me this long to reach where I am now?

MEntity:

It took this long because you were more concerned with completion than with speed. The pace through the monad was irrelevant. That you evolved was the goal.

This amount of time for completion of the 4IM is not unusual. It took our channel 8 years to complete his.

Bogi: You are right. I was more concerned with the "end" than the journey. I have another question that may or may not be related to this topic.

MEntity: Yes, we are ready.

Bogi:

My second question refers to a conversation we had a few months ago. There you said that I abdicated my Agreements with someone because “we both are too distracted with our own internal struggles.”

We discussed in a subsequent conversation how I see it, but in the aftermath, I had the feeling that I did not give you enough space to share your point of view.

How would *you* describe the nature of my internal struggles?

MEntity: 

First, we would say that "how you see it" is more relevant than how we see it. We only offer our perspective to be considered and validated alongside your own not to usurp your own.

Your struggle as we perceive it is the struggle to source your happiness in yourself, rather than in another. You are working out how to allow another to reflect your own happiness.

You are working out how to allow another to SHARE your happiness. But this process has been a distraction because you are still learning how to trust yourself and another. At the moment and in relation to this particular fragment, it is easier to digest the experience on your own than it is to deal with the "minefields" of trust and disappointment and triggers that must be owned and worked through.

Also, you have worked so hard and come so far to define and love yourself; you are savoring this completion and testing it in intimacy with another, naturally, throws you out of that center.

Bogi: 

I see. It is beautiful and challenging. And I agree with your assessment again.

I think I am on the right "track" in this process, I just need to allow myself time, work on it and work it out.

MEntity:

You will learn to navigate another from your center, eventually, and it will be your choice when and with whom you take that plunge, so to speak.

Yes, it is beautiful and challenging. We also see the beauty in this dance you are having with yourself and the dance you are having with the fragment in question. You are both "there for one another" in ways that can easily be missed by personality.

We agree that you are "on the right track."

Bogi: Our time is up for today. Is there something that you would like to share with me regarding what we discussed today?

MEntity: We always have more to say but as our time is up, we will simply say that we love you, and you are doing GOOD WORK. Goodbye for now. Good day to you, Bogi.

Bogi:

Thank you Michael and big hugs to Babylove.

OMG I just saw that you said you love me, thank you Michael, I love you guys too.

**********************************

NOTES:

It is a rich session with a lot of layers. The content is in tune with my previous sessions via Troy. Even some of the wording and the references are the same (e.g. dancing).

With the first question, I wanted to explore my capacity to choose. If there is anything that "stands" in the ways that needs be addressed, or is it "only" the weight of the responsability when one starts to choose more consciously and authentically.

I like that they pointed out something that I have been pondering about a few days ago. "It took this long because you were more concerned with completion than with speed."

It reminded me what Royce said in a similar topic.

  Quote

Personally, I hold very little interest in completing my soul ages. Mostly due to the fact that I am just beginning to take steps in enjoying this life. No rush to die. If I stay at the 4th IM for 20 years, cool. Besides, we couldn’t even rush this shit if we wanted to. If I wanted to wake up today, deciding fully that I wanted to complete my IM’s today...I would be delusional , repressed and avoidant. I think that it is ok that it takes forever. I think that it is great that it takes forever. I think a part of us enjoys that it takes forever. I think we really love doing this life thing far more than we love leveling up. I think this experience of gradual evolution is quite possibly the most beautiful experience existence has to offer and is the sole reason why all of existence is so eager to interact with this molasses of a physical plane. This is where we taste evolution, savour it. Nowhere else can we savour quite like the physical plane.

With the second question, I already wanted last time to formulate my question this way, them answering without me interfering and giving my two cents. This is also a dance. Between the teacher and the student. How to teach and how to learn. I learned that we agree on this. It is true that I worked hard on being myself, and I am still learning how to trust myself, so when someone else entered the picture, with his own woundings and triggers, the experience threw me off my newly-found/created center, and became the source of distraction. It is a dance with myself between how to be myself and be with others. My astro chart nicely references this. I am an Aries with Libra Rising. The Aries is the *I* and the Libra is the *you*. And I am dancing between the two. 

When I said that this dance is beautiful and challenging, I was not referring to this particular Fragment, but in general. Still, it is nice to hear that on the Astral, we are still dancing. I agree, because from time to time I am still dreaming about him, but in a less triggering way. 

It has been a healing session for me, thank you @Nick Sweeney (Babylove).

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