0301 Relationship with mother
Exact session date is unknown but is sometime early in 2017.
Uma: my first question has to do with what happened with my mother, her husband and my inheritance. as you know, it was a sticky relationship and it ended badly. is there karma involved?
Michael: We do not see external Karma, but we do see a convergence of Self-Karma among those involved and this can bring a great deal of difficulty to communication, negotiation, clarity, intimacy, etc. When Self-Karma is involved there are intense triggers at work that prompt an individual into defenses and offenses, which can feel a great deal like external Karma.
Uma: why did she reneg on her promise to me and my sister of leaving us our houses?
Michael: Self-Karma can lead to Karma or help to address Karma, but in this case it looks to have been contained to Self-Karma.
Uma: what exactly do you mean by Self-Karma. I don't really get it, although it is good to know I did not add Karmic ribbons with either of them.
Michael: The promise appears to have been changed based on ideas presented about who might need more and who might need less, based on perceptions of strength and resources. We do not see any malice, but we do see influences that helped to change original ideas. It appears to have been a vote of confidence in you over being an intentional insult or breaking of promise.
Uma: okay. i'll digest that info. she broke promises my whole life. maybe this will help me get over it.
Michael:
These kinds of issues can be difficult even for us to sort until everyone is in Review (after the life), but there was precedent set long ago for the "changing of the mind" and malleability of the promises that continued to the "end." Self-Karma is an intensity of inner conflict within an individual.
It is when one is divided within the self, where personal choices interfere with one's own choices.
Uma: whose Self-karma was it? mine? hers? Hugh's?
Michael: For example, if one is a smoker, she may have Self-Karma around this because her choice is to quit smoking, but she continues to smoke. Her choices interfere with her choices and creates a divide within.
Uma: touché
Michael: All involved had Self-Karmic issues.
Uma: it ended in such as way as to make me think karma had been created and I was unhappy with that thought. thank you for clearing that up.
Michael: The truth is that as each of you take responsibility for the healing of your internal rifts, the more likely you could see the innocence in one another.
Uma: it has been very difficult to see the innocence in Hugh or my mother for many many years. I'll give it a shot.
Michael:
But there are issues of entitlement, old wounding, immaturity, presumption, projection, etc. Seeing the innocence in another does not equate ignoring your pain.
Consider this:
Who one is now is never only who one is now, but is often a multitude of experiences, confusion, pain, and defenses stacked on top of a child. Choices and actions that come from this wounding and defense still have repercussions that are valid and feel painful to those who receive the impact from those choices, but for the older soul, it can be deeply healing to connect to the truth of another's innocence, the child who is at the center of all of that protection....It is possible to feel and acknowledge the pain and hurt and irresponsibility, and even the harmful intent of another individual all while connecting to that inner innocence. These are two separate things to experience and cannot be conflated. This means you can take a moment to reflect on that innocence as its own thing, and then return to your need to address the wounds caused by that person. What you will find is that the reflecting on the innocence not only helps you to move toward Essence Recognition, but also helps you to keep your own innocence from being buried to the point of behaving only from defense and wounding. When you behave from innocence, it does not protect you from pain and harm, but it does provide you with resilience, life-force, and optimism.