1128 Exploring new territory in life - 2018 is where the adventures begin

Exploring new territory in life - 2018 is where the adventures begin

60 M Live session - November 28, 2017

This was a messy session on my part, looking at my comments, so I’ve left much of it out and just kept what was really necessary to keep here. That’s how it goes while jumping unprepared into a session and processing during it. My energy was all over, but now I think it was ok.

Q: I asked M about help and perspectives on different things because I felt like going in a circle in my life, standing still, though knowing I’m not, and that I had a hard time making choices that get me any further….       

MEntity: First, we will ask you an important defining factor: what do you envision "further" to mean? What are you comparing when you look at where you are and where you think you should be?           

Q: I mentioned to them; creating a life that I like and want, and not just waiting for things to happen or not daring to create. I've been on hold for so long that I find it hard to take further steps or not daring to take steps and follow my impulses, and sometimes I don't know which steps to take, and that's maybe when I go into Self-deprecation and Impatience. I said I thought I was confused…

MEntity: We will work with you. What do you not like about your current life? Why do you not like your life now?           

Q: I feel too isolated, have a meager social life, not doing what I would love to do or create. After 4 years of taking care of a family member (but not any longer) I feel stuck, and I have been dealing with health on and off.       

MEntity:

To start your changes of condition in your life, you must begin with liking, loving, understanding where you ARE before you can orient yourself toward where you would like to be. You must understand that you are getting to know yourself again. You have known yourself as someone defined by the needs of someone else for a long time.            

Part of you craves meaning through the needs of others so you created space and time for yourself so that you could choose to exist WITH others, not FOR others.   

What you have done is create a very clear picture of your own needs now.      

You NEED to socialize. This is your need. It is not someone else's. It may feel like you have been isolated, but you can see the love in this effort to understand your own needs.      

You NEED affection. You NEED conversation. You NEED mutual support. You NEED excitement and laughter. Etc. You may have wished for these things, and you may have known you needed them, but you always found ways to put the needs of others first, instead. You no longer have anyone to eclipse your needs.

Let yourself have this long period of time that was for you and you, alone. It is a gift. It is a kindness. It is a process of clarity.      

However, now that you know what you need and are fully aware of how much you need them, you must do the work of fulfilling those needs.

Do you find that you live in an isolated area geographically?      

Do you have access to events and gatherings that are of interest to you locally?

Q: I said in a way because I don’t know many people here where I live, but I can always use public transportation and get out to events for instance or to meet others.

MEntity: This is what we mean by "doing the work." You may have to travel to access groups. You may have to reach out to access groups. You may have to use technology to match you with those of mutual interest. There are friendship apps and dating apps and meetup apps. There is nothing to stop you from finding and/or creating what you need.       

Q: Then I asked if Self-deprecation was “running the show”?

MEntity:

It may feel daunting and you may find yourself feeling defeated before you even begin. Listen to your fears, and then continue forward. Your fears have protected you, but they need to be updated when they try to protect you from something you desire now.          

Self-deprecation is not running the show. You have legitimate fears that are simply outdated. You fear other people while desiring their company. You were vulnerable for so long that you had to focus on shaping clearer boundaries. You wanted to be fully ready when you began to stumble into social situations. You wanted to know where you begin and end on your own terms.

If you can shift your perspective to see your past 9 to 12 months as a gift to yourself, as a transitionary gift, you can take a fresh look at your future and begin using renewed energy and enthusiasm and creativity for your needs.

You are draining your enthusiasm and energy when you see yourself as trapped. You are not trapped. You are simply trying something new and you are very new at this. You must be patient and loving. You have been able to show great patience and love to others who stumble in life. You can do the same for you.     

You are exploring new territory in your life. Your wounding is not stopping you. Your health is not stopping you. Your wounding and health issues are a part of life. They do not define your life.

So your first step is to look back at your year as something wonderful and unexpected and loving that changed in your life and that you needed some time to catch your breath and find your ground. 2018 is where the adventures begin.      

Q: Yes, I know, and I already did, but not enough.

Q: Is it eventually time left for a message from my Essence?       

MEntity:

MESSAGE:  

A SOLID WALL IS FULL OF MOVING ATOMS.

WHAT YOU THINK YOU SEE IS NOT ALWAYS ALL THERE IS TO SEE.   

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